Friday, July 14, 2006


ABOVE: Can you tell it's Barbaro? Of course not, it's just a fucking horse.

Much of America has been caught up in the story of 'Barbaro', the horse that won the Kentucky Derby and was a favorite to win the Preakness several weeks ago. But seconds after starting, Barbaro shattered bones in his leg.

Then, as reported by the AP:

"Race fans [six weeks ago] at Pimlico wept and within 24 hours the entire nation seemed to be caught up in a "Barbaro watch," waiting for any news of his surgery and condition."

Today, the one millionth update on this story, also from the AP:

"[The veterinarian] Dr. Richardson, told a packed news conference Thursday that the 3-year-old colt has a severe case of the disease laminitis in his left hind leg, and termed his prognosis as "poor."

Hold on, folks, I need to put down this box of Kleenex and collect myself...

Why the fuck is it a 'packed news conference'? I don't know what laminitis is and I don't care. I am sick and tired of seeing constant updates about this on ESPN and even mainstream news outlets. (It is a headline story on the websites of CNN, Fox News, CBS News, MSNBC, and ABC as I write this). To put things in perspective for my non-US audience, this story has received more coverage than the Zidane incident.

I don't give two shits about a damn horse. Israel and Lebanon are trading rockets, North Korea is trying to acquire nukes, and Iraq is, well, Iraq. Maybe you'll tell me that sports journalists have to report on sports even during dangerous events. You're absolutely right. And I have no problem with showing me baseball highlights to temporarily distract me from President Bush's foreign policy debacles. But to talk about the health of a race horse when scores of people are dying across the globe--now you've gone too far. Plus, horse racing is barely even a sport. It's gambling with live animals.

Barbaro's jockey said, "All we can do now is hope and pray. We'll need a miracle, but maybe it will happen."

How about praying for world peace? Or a cure for AIDS? I will be praying, too, alright--that all you douchebags get euthanized too!